Eating Disorders & Attachment Styles
Written by Emily Costa
In the intricate landscape of mental health, eating disorders stand as complex conditions often interwoven with other psychological factors. One such factor, attachment style, can play a significant role in understanding the onset, progression, and treatment of these disorders. In this blog, we delve into the intricate relationship between eating disorders and attachment styles, aiming to provide a comprehensive understanding of how attachment styles can influence eating behaviors and contribute to the development of disorders such as anorexia, bulimia, and binge eating.
What is an attachment style?
Attachment style refers to the particular way in which an individual relates to other people. Originating from the early bonds formed with caregivers, it profoundly influences how we interact with others and perceive our relationships throughout our lifetime. There are primarily four types of attachment styles: secure, anxious-preoccupied, dismissive-avoidant, and fearful-avoidant. Each style carries its unique pattern of expectations, needs, and behaviors in relationships, affecting various aspects of our mental and emotional health, including our susceptibility to eating disorders.
The 4 different types of attachment styles
Secure attachment
Secure attachment style is characterized by a strong and stable sense of self-worth and an ability to form healthy and fulfilling relationships with others. Individuals with a secure attachment style tend to be comfortable with intimacy and independence, balancing their needs effectively between the two. They're often capable of reflecting on their experiences, maintaining openness, and are resilient in the face of emotional distress. In the context of eating disorders, those with a secure attachment style are generally less likely to develop such conditions due to their adaptive coping mechanisms and supportive social connections.
Anxious-preoccupied attachment
Anxious-preoccupied attachment style is marked by a pervasive need for approval and reassurance from others, often stemming from a low sense of self-worth and a fear of being rejected or abandoned. Individuals with this type of attachment style may have a tendency to be overly dependent on their partners or friends for emotional support, constantly seeking validation to mitigate their insecurities. Their relationships are typically characterized by high levels of emotional intensity and conflict, as they struggle to reconcile their desire for intimacy with their fear of abandonment.
Dismissive-avoidant attachment
The dismissive-avoidant attachment style is characterized by a strong sense of independence and self-sufficiency, often to the point of avoiding close relationships with others. Individuals with this attachment style may seem detached and uninterested in forming intimate bonds, striving to maintain their autonomy at all costs. They tend to suppress their feelings, keeping emotional distance, and often struggle with recognizing and responding to the emotional needs of others.
Fearful-avoidant (disorganized) attachment style
This style is marked by a combination of negative views of self and others. Individuals with this attachment style often harbor a deep fear of rejection and abandonment, similar to those with an anxious-preoccupied style. However, unlike the latter, they also tend to be uncomfortable with emotional closeness and intimacy, mirroring the characteristics of individuals with a dismissive-avoidant style. Their relationships are usually fraught with turmoil, as they struggle to reconcile their desire for intimacy with their fear of getting too close.
Binging and Overeating and their Connection to Attachment Styles
Overeating and binge eating share a complex connection with attachment styles, primarily rooted in the emotional coping mechanisms associated with each style. Anxious-preoccupied individuals, who inherently seek validation and fear abandonment, might resort to overeating or binge eating as a form of emotional regulation, using food to alleviate their anxiety and feelings of insecurity. The momentary comfort provided by food serves as a proxy for the emotional support they incessantly seek from their relationships.
Dismissive-avoidant individuals, on the other hand, may use overeating or binge eating as a form of asserting control or maintaining emotional distance. By focusing their attention on their eating habits, they can divert their energy away from their suppressed emotions or potential vulnerabilities in their relationships.
The fearful-avoidant individuals, caught between their fear of abandonment and discomfort with closeness, may exhibit erratic eating behaviors, including episodes of overeating or binge eating. These eating habits can serve as an effort to manage the intense emotional upheaval stemming from their tumultuous relationships. Their inconsistent and unpredictable relationship patterns can lead to high levels of stress and anxiety, which they might attempt to regulate through maladaptive eating behaviors.
Related: Bulimia v. Binge Eating Disorder: What's the Difference?
Purging and Restricting and their Connection to Attachment Styles
Just as with overeating and binge eating, purging and restriction behaviors are also intertwined with attachment styles. People with anxious-preoccupied attachment may resort to these behaviors in an effort to gain control over their emotions and fears of abandonment. For them, restriction and purging can act as coping mechanisms to deal with the instability and anxiety inherent in their relationships.
Dismissive-avoidant individuals, valuing independence and self-sufficiency, might use purging and restriction as a form of self-control, reinforcing their sense of autonomy. These behaviors allow them to maintain an emotional distance, focusing on their control over food and body rather than on emotional intimacy.
Fearful-avoidant individuals, with their conflicting desires for closeness and fear of intimacy, might exhibit inconsistent behaviors with food. At times, they might engage in restriction to assert control and independence, while at other times, they may resort to purging as a maladaptive way to cope with emotional distress.
Learning Coping Skills
Learning coping skills is a vital aspect of the treatment process for eating disorders. These skills serve as alternative responses to emotions and situations that would have previously triggered unhealthy eating behaviors. They help individuals manage stress, anxiety, fear, and other intense emotions in a healthy and adaptive way.
For individuals with anxious-preoccupied attachment, learning coping skills can help them find healthier ways to seek validation and manage their fear of abandonment, reducing their need to use food as an emotional crutch. Those with dismissive-avoidant attachment can learn how to express and handle emotions appropriately, minimizing their need to assert control through their eating habits. For the fearful-avoidant individuals, coping skills can provide a sense of stability, helping them navigate the emotional turmoil of their relationships without resorting to maladaptive eating behaviors.
In essence, learning effective coping skills can directly address the root cause of purging, restriction, overeating, and binge eating behaviors. By offering healthier methods to deal with negative emotions and relationship insecurities, these skills can help individuals break free from the vicious cycle of disordered eating. This underscores the value of incorporating coping skills training in eating disorder treatment programs, as it not only addresses the symptoms but also targets the underlying issues tied to attachment styles.
The Importance of Communication Skills
Learning how to communicate effectively is a critical adjunct to coping skills in mitigating eating disorder behaviors. Proper communication can help individuals express their feelings, needs, fears, and thoughts more clearly to others, preventing misunderstandings and promoting better support from their social network. This, in turn, can decrease feelings of loneliness, isolation, and misunderstanding, key triggers of disordered eating. Furthermore, effective communication can foster better self-understanding. As individuals articulate their feelings and thoughts, they gain clarity about their own emotional state, which can aid in identifying triggers and implementing appropriate coping skills.
The DEAR MAN Communication Technique
The DEAR MAN communication technique is an important tool that can be integrated into the process of treating eating disorders. DEAR MAN is an acronym that stands for Describe, Express, Assert, Reinforce, Stay Mindful, Appear Confident, and Negotiate. This strategy is primarily used in Dialectical Behavior Therapy to aid individuals in effectively asserting their needs and setting boundaries, which can play a significant role in managing the triggers and stressors associated with disordered eating.
Describe involves clearly stating the situation or the behavior that is causing distress. Express is when the person communicates their feelings about the issue. Assert refers to asking for what one needs or saying no firmly. Reinforce is the step where positive outcomes of getting what one wants or needs are highlighted. The next two steps focus on the manner of communication: one should stay Mindful by focusing on the issue at hand and avoid being side-tracked, and Appear confident to ensure their message is received assertively. Finally, negotiating is about being willing to give and take, and finding a compromise.
In the context of eating disorders, the DEAR MAN technique can help individuals to communicate their feelings, needs, and boundaries more effectively, whether it's with their therapists, loved ones, or even themselves. This can be a major step towards establishing healthier coping mechanisms and overcoming the cycle of disordered eating.
In conclusion, understanding the link between overeating, binge eating, and attachment styles can pave the way for more effective therapeutic interventions, helping individuals develop healthier coping mechanisms and ultimately break free from the cycle of disordered eating. The interplay between eating disorders and attachment styles underscores the importance of a holistic approach in treating these complex conditions.
At Central Coast Treatment Center, we prioritize a comprehensive approach to treating eating disorders, recognizing the crucial role that attachment styles play in the manifestation and maintenance of these conditions. Our experienced team of therapists works closely with clients, delving deep into their personal histories, relationship patterns, and emotional responses to understand their unique attachment styles.
If you are ready to break free from disordered eating behaviors and embark on a path towards recovery and emotional health, reach out to our Admissions team today to learn more about our programs and services.
Emily Costa
Having struggled with an eating disorder herself, Emily is passionate about spreading awareness, education and the possibility of recovery with others. Emily previously volunteered as a Crisis Text Line counselor and with the eating disorder non-profit Project HEAL where she served as their blog manager, their NYC Chapter Leader & a recovery mentor in their Communities of HEALing pilot program completing training by the Carolyn Costin Institute. Emily now enjoys working with various treatment centers, clinicians and non-profits in the eating disorder community providing marketing and design services. In her free time she enjoys spending time with friends, hanging with her dogs, and reading a book at the beach.